It was 4 weeks ago today that I had my prophylactic total gastrectomy for CDH1 and because it was in February (and this isn't a leap year) that means it was also one month ago today. 3 weeks ago today I got out of the hospital. A lot has transpired in those 3 weeks. For the most part I'm doing pretty well and adjusting to this new life. But then there are days that things aren't going quite as well. Today is one of those days that I don't feel bad, but I don't feel great. I don't even really know how to describe it. This morning, just a couple hours after getting up, I laid down for a few minutes that turned into over an hour. I wasn't really tired, but just didn't feel great so laid down. I know it's OK. I know I'm still recovering. I know it will get better and it is better, but sometimes I just get tired of it and want to quit. I don't want to eat every 2 hours. I don't want to drink in between eating. I don't want to go for a walk. I just want to lay here or sit here and do nothing.
Tomorrow's a new day. We'll see what tomorrow brings.
So sorry, Linda. I fully commiserate. I rebel against the dictates of an unhealthy appendage! Yet I know I must be a responsible steward of the only body I have been given! It is difficult to orient my days to pain relief and optimal care so that healing occurs. Nevertheless, that is our task for these times. Hang in there. This too shall pass.
ReplyDeleteThat was a week ago. I've been doing much better since. More good days than bad days, or maybe I should say good moments than bad moments. I really haven't had very many entirely bad days. I wish you well in your recovery also. There is a brighter tomorrow.
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